FandomSecrets House: Episode 2
Jan. 10th, 2013 05:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chardmonster Previously on FandomSecrets House
When we last left our heroes:
The Human Embodiment of England has no idea what's going on. There's Noodle in his underwear. Chard and GreenVelvet are complaining about the lack of food despite there being an entire meal RIGHT THERE. MakingMistakes is having an incredibly loud and uncomfortable bowel movement. This isn't what he signed up for. This is horrible. He has a breakdown.
PHONES!
MOTHERFUCKING PHONES! Peter lightly jabs Biohazard's boob.
THEY INVENTED THESE PHONES YOU CAN PUT IN YOUR PANTS
CELL-PHONES
But n1curr :(
Fingals Anteater suffers the pain of boob odor.
She schemes to seduce Peter while BIohazard completely abandons him to the smelly adults and goes to sleep. Fuck you too Biohazard
A boy learns the bitter truths of manhood
InsaneNoodlyGuy has one of his characteristic plumbing related ragefits.UNF SHOULDERS
"Sssh. It's okay. We'll bang, okay?"
MakingMistakes just flat out takes a bath while Noodle fixes the toilet. So logical and businesslike!
Chard promptly pisses herself.
LAUGH AT ME, WILL YOU?
The fire itself was pretty unremarkable and quickly contained. Biohazard's a wimp and was traumatized anyway.
Fingal is tired of this shit. She's needs a distraction. A release.
She is going to cyberfuck some bitches. She immediately logs into ShangrilaMUSH as Cell'e'bryan, the Elven Bondage Maiden.
The result, dear reader, is the saddest Sim memory I have ever seen.
Naturally Fingal feels a bit dirty.
FUCK IT. Her name's Molly French, right? Molly French. Fingal immediately Facebook stalks her. "Works at Single Mothers' House." Well. that sounds a bit shady but FUCK IT FINGAL'S MAKING THIS REAL.
Fingal immediately macks on some hot MILF
She then barges right inside.
Undeterred by the unannounced arrival of Cell'e'bryan The Bondage Maiden, Dark Mistress Cuntacula adapts.
Fingal immediately takes it to the bedroom. "It's okay. The kid can stay. I'm an exhibitionist."
But Molly French negs her.
Molly French negs her about as hard as a woman can possibly BE negged.
But Fingal's like whatever man, you'll come round.
Back at the house Noodle wakes up.
Chard indulges in her standard Rocky Horror fap fantasy.
Fingal is making herself comfortable.
She even helps herself to a snack.
She then attempts to merge consciousnesses with the hot MILF. Sssh. It's okay.
EMBRACE ETERNITY
Meanwhile, while the director was forgetting to take screenshots, Chard and Noodle decided to go to the gym together. Except for some reason Chard has to run. What?
MOTHERFUCKER I TOLD YOU I HAD TO PEE BEFORE WE LEFT. I ALWAYS HAVE TO PEE FIRST. AND FIND MY SHOES AND FIX MY HAIR AND THEN PEE AGAIN YOU KNOW THE FUCKING DRILL NOODLE! GOD
Anyway Noodle makes a new friend.
Noodle swiftly has another bathroom ragefit.
But it's cool man. Nah, it's cool. I am the Page of Plumbing. It's cool.
Oh dear god what am I wearing
Chard shakes it like a Polaroid picture, by which I mean obsoletely.
Noodle continues his toilet rage outside the bathroom.
Meanwhile, Fingal hungers after phallic objects.
The single moms stare on, disgusted.
No I do not want to discuss tentacle rape I prefer vore
Say that to my face bitch and see what happens
Meanwhile Noodle is laying it on a bit thick.
Oh what the everliving fuck has been going on in my absence. How many people have pissed themselves now?
Oh well. I'll just order some people to pissmop duty and others to take baths and everything will be what
what
YOU GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKER WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME YOU HOMESHIT
I really do hate you
The sight of you is so disgusting that Little Chard is actually on a treadmill. It gives he a polite reason to TURN HER BACK ON YOU
It isn't going well. Downstairs, a woman pisses her pants.
To age is pain.
No I will not get you a fucking towel.
Chardmonster uses treadmill!
She hurts herself in her confusion.
Okay I'd better check on the hoWHATTHESHIT
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, CLASSY LADIES
At least someone thought to get a repair guy. Meanwhile, GreenVelvetCake is getting better at cooking!
She talks to the repair guy a bit, helpfully distracting him from the gushing sink.
OH WHAT THE SHIT
GreenVelvetCake briefly considers ending it all.
She instead throws herself at the inferno.
Fingal has to sneeze. The Human Embodiment of England pouts unhelpfully.
The fireman arrives shortly after the fire is put out. The toilet has been retextured with a jungle ruin from the new Tomb Raider.
"I KNOW! THE INTERNET."
DAT ASS
Crisis averted, GreenVelvetCake contemplates a different, slower form of suicide.
This is the only thing that brings her joy now.
ACTUALLY PART TWO IS GOING UP LIKE TOMORROW I'M BUSY OK
When we last left our heroes:
The Human Embodiment of England has no idea what's going on. There's Noodle in his underwear. Chard and GreenVelvet are complaining about the lack of food despite there being an entire meal RIGHT THERE. MakingMistakes is having an incredibly loud and uncomfortable bowel movement. This isn't what he signed up for. This is horrible. He has a breakdown.
PHONES!
MOTHERFUCKING PHONES! Peter lightly jabs Biohazard's boob.
THEY INVENTED THESE PHONES YOU CAN PUT IN YOUR PANTS
CELL-PHONES
But n1curr :(
Fingals Anteater suffers the pain of boob odor.
She schemes to seduce Peter while BIohazard completely abandons him to the smelly adults and goes to sleep. Fuck you too Biohazard
A boy learns the bitter truths of manhood
InsaneNoodlyGuy has one of his characteristic plumbing related ragefits.
"Sssh. It's okay. We'll bang, okay?"
MakingMistakes just flat out takes a bath while Noodle fixes the toilet. So logical and businesslike!
Chard promptly pisses herself.
LAUGH AT ME, WILL YOU?
The fire itself was pretty unremarkable and quickly contained. Biohazard's a wimp and was traumatized anyway.
Fingal is tired of this shit. She's needs a distraction. A release.
She is going to cyberfuck some bitches. She immediately logs into ShangrilaMUSH as Cell'e'bryan, the Elven Bondage Maiden.
The result, dear reader, is the saddest Sim memory I have ever seen.
Naturally Fingal feels a bit dirty.
FUCK IT. Her name's Molly French, right? Molly French. Fingal immediately Facebook stalks her. "Works at Single Mothers' House." Well. that sounds a bit shady but FUCK IT FINGAL'S MAKING THIS REAL.
Fingal immediately macks on some hot MILF
She then barges right inside.
Undeterred by the unannounced arrival of Cell'e'bryan The Bondage Maiden, Dark Mistress Cuntacula adapts.
Fingal immediately takes it to the bedroom. "It's okay. The kid can stay. I'm an exhibitionist."
But Molly French negs her.
Molly French negs her about as hard as a woman can possibly BE negged.
But Fingal's like whatever man, you'll come round.
Back at the house Noodle wakes up.
Chard indulges in her standard Rocky Horror fap fantasy.
Fingal is making herself comfortable.
She even helps herself to a snack.
She then attempts to merge consciousnesses with the hot MILF. Sssh. It's okay.
EMBRACE ETERNITY
Meanwhile, while the director was forgetting to take screenshots, Chard and Noodle decided to go to the gym together. Except for some reason Chard has to run. What?
MOTHERFUCKER I TOLD YOU I HAD TO PEE BEFORE WE LEFT. I ALWAYS HAVE TO PEE FIRST. AND FIND MY SHOES AND FIX MY HAIR AND THEN PEE AGAIN YOU KNOW THE FUCKING DRILL NOODLE! GOD
Anyway Noodle makes a new friend.
Noodle swiftly has another bathroom ragefit.
But it's cool man. Nah, it's cool. I am the Page of Plumbing. It's cool.
Oh dear god what am I wearing
Chard shakes it like a Polaroid picture, by which I mean obsoletely.
Noodle continues his toilet rage outside the bathroom.
Meanwhile, Fingal hungers after phallic objects.
The single moms stare on, disgusted.
No I do not want to discuss tentacle rape I prefer vore
Say that to my face bitch and see what happens
Meanwhile Noodle is laying it on a bit thick.
Oh what the everliving fuck has been going on in my absence. How many people have pissed themselves now?
Oh well. I'll just order some people to pissmop duty and others to take baths and everything will be what
what
YOU GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKER WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME YOU HOMESHIT
I really do hate you
The sight of you is so disgusting that Little Chard is actually on a treadmill. It gives he a polite reason to TURN HER BACK ON YOU
It isn't going well. Downstairs, a woman pisses her pants.
To age is pain.
No I will not get you a fucking towel.
Chardmonster uses treadmill!
She hurts herself in her confusion.
Okay I'd better check on the hoWHATTHESHIT
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, CLASSY LADIES
At least someone thought to get a repair guy. Meanwhile, GreenVelvetCake is getting better at cooking!
She talks to the repair guy a bit, helpfully distracting him from the gushing sink.
OH WHAT THE SHIT
GreenVelvetCake briefly considers ending it all.
She instead throws herself at the inferno.
Fingal has to sneeze. The Human Embodiment of England pouts unhelpfully.
The fireman arrives shortly after the fire is put out. The toilet has been retextured with a jungle ruin from the new Tomb Raider.
"I KNOW! THE INTERNET."
DAT ASS
Crisis averted, GreenVelvetCake contemplates a different, slower form of suicide.
This is the only thing that brings her joy now.
ACTUALLY PART TWO IS GOING UP LIKE TOMORROW I'M BUSY OK
no subject
Date: 2013-01-11 12:53 am (UTC)Jesus this is the most unstable house in history
I get the feeling that The Human Embodiment of England will soon snap and go on a murdering spree. You can see it in his eyes.
soon
But until then, ICE CREAM
no subject
Date: 2013-01-11 02:02 am (UTC)You are actually the most responsible person in the house right now which means just about nothing but I figured I'd let you know
You fight all the fires.